Have you ever considered what it costs just to be alive? Ponder with me.
You have to eat. That means you have to buy food. They come in packages that must be discarded in a trashcan. So you have to buy a trashcan. And trash bags. And then you have to pay the city to come by and get it. But let's say you decide to toss your trash on the ground instead, you know, bypass the expenses of cans, bags, and city. Well, if you litter, and you get caught, you still have to give up some cheese.
And on the other end - you have to pay for the water in the toilet to carry away the leftovers.
What about hygiene? What must you buy just to be clean? Soap. Wash cloths. Comb. More water bills. If you are like me, then a loufa. Shampoo. Towels. Toothbrush. Toothpaste. Floss. You could blow a budget in the hygiene arena alone.
So let's say you get a job. How are you going to get there? Well, you got to get a car. And then gas. And insurance. And oil changes. And inspections. You even have to pay for the roads that you drive on.
So you decide to go public transit instead. Well, bus' require tickets. Tickets require more money.
And after work you have to go home. Home. Those cost money too. If you are like me then you have rent and utilities. I don't pay housenotes yet. But housenotes are just adult code language for "more money." Not to mention repairs, light bulbs, brooms, dust pans, vacuums, dusters, cleaning supplies for the bathroom (I don't have any of these), and all the money it will take for you to fill it with furnature, kitchen gear, and pictures and frames for the walls.
Now, you can't walk around naked. You have to get at least a shirt and pants. But not just one pair of pants. You have to buy an extra pair of shorts and wear these UNDER the pants. Why we do this, I don't know. I think it is like Halmark holidays, they are made up just so that we can shell out more cash. Don't get me wrong, I wear underwear, I just don't know why I do.
Besides, every step you take ruffles the threads in your clothes, creating a nonstop wear and tear which will inevitably force you to buy more. Buying more = giving away more money.
We Americans like our entertainment. This usually doesn't come free. Movies. Video games. TV shows. Internet. Laptops. Board games. Musicals. Sporting events. Bars even make you give up a few bucks to play pool.
And on and on I could go. I could get into alcohol or cigarettes, whatever tickles your fancy. I could get into books or magazines. Or coffee. Or even paper. Believe it or not, I could go on and on, but I will spare us all. It is clear though - every thing you do costs money. Every breath you pull in can be calculated as an expense. Every step you take could be factored into your budget (especially if you are on the envelope system). But there are a few things I have discovered that come free. I will impart my knowledge on you at this time:
THINGS THAT ARE FREE
1. Staring. You can stare at anything really. Except the sun. And then this activity will cost you a great amount of money.
2. Eating trash. People go to Denny's. Don't finish their meal. Get up and leave. I'm talking free mashed potatos and left over chicken fingers. All for the cost of your pride.
3. Checking the time. This activity can be fun in high school. And as long as it isn't a watch or clock you bought, it is a free activity.
4. Drinking water from a water fountain at a public library. In a strange way, I feel that this does not come free. Somehow taxes are funding that water. I don't know about this one.
5. Any number of gerunds come free. Squeezing, pulling, begging, walking, rummaging, stalking, plundering, ripping, tearing, sliding, sitting, resting, climbing, panhandling, squeezing. The list is almost endless, except for the end of it. There is also squeezing.
6. Having a blog. Go to the public library with free internet access. Get you a blog. They're free and quite fun. You get to indulge yourself in your own thoughts and then sit and wait for attention and approval by way of "comments."
If anyone else can think of free activities and/or items of use, it would indeed be appreciated, as I am committing myself to a frugal life of frugality.
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6 comments:
Lol, I think if I were that hard up that Denny's trash were even a option I'd suck up my pride and go to the YMCA for a shower and then head to the nearest food pantry for some groceries. Leftover gravy just doesn't sound that good right now.
By the way, hope your ivy's cleared up; and make sure you're using vitamin A&E gel to avoid scarring ;-)
Vitamin A&E, like the show or the channel. I don't know, I don't watch either. A & E are the two letters that grape and tomatoes have in common. I think it stands for American Grape. Except exchange a G for E.
If you can come up with some sort of occasion where people give you gifts, then that's a free activity (for you).
Birthday, graduation, new apartment or house, etc. People give you stuff.
Find churches that offer communion every Sunday: free snack. (also check out grocery stores with samples)
Sleep, read, run, walk, etc. in a public park.
Throw rocks into a body of water.
And this one is covered by your Internet bill: send me your address, please.
i really enjoyed your blog about the cost of living. however, the subject i wish to talk about is kathryn. i like her a lot. i want to get her address or something so we can be pen pals. maybe she has a blog and i can simply stalk her every move from there. please bring her to the wedding. tell her i'm begging and it is pathetic. -nicole
Just think if you didn't exist.
Don't waste your life, but love God by enjoying him forever, but don't baptize your babies!
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