Sometimes when I use a public restroom I don't wash my hands after I'm finished. But I put on an elaborate production to make those around me THINK I am washing my hands. I run the water. Sometimes I put my hands under the stream, sometimes I don't (it depends if the others in the restroom can see me or if they are just listening). I tap the soap dispenser to make the noise like I was in fact actually pumping soap out of it. So with the water running, I stand there and wait for about how long it would take for me to actually wash my hands. Then I turn off the water, tear off a few pieces of paper towel, rub them all over my dry hands and toss the dry towels into the trash. Then I leave the bathroom confident that whoever happened to share that room with me knew that I took the time to wash my hands. They believe I'm not one of "those" people, you know, the kind that just do their business and then disgustingly walk out.
I am not joking. I actually do this. I just did in fact (that was what gave me this idea).
Here's my question: Am I alone in this sickness? Is there anyone else out there as disgusting as me and willing to admit it or am I, as I suspect, the only one who would go to such lengths to avoid having to actually wash my hands? Now is the time. You can come forward and admit it. There is no shame. Consider this an altar call. Just imagine the song "Just As I Am" playing over and over in the background.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
The worst is when you do it when you are alone.
Why go to all the trouble of pretending? Wouldn't it be just as easy to actually *wash your hands*?
I was greatly disturbed last year when I was at a movie theatre, and my brother came back from the bathroom. He told me that out of the five guys in the bathroom at the same time he was there, only 2 of them washed their hands. Now I can't even be sure of that figure!! Yuck.
i thought i was the only one in the world who did this, but nope.
Why stop with your hands? That's what I want to know? Why not wash all of your body, including your member? If you want to be clean, you should go all the way. That is why I bring an extra set of clothes when I go out. I carry a duffle bag to the bathroom, and strip down when in the stall (this doesn't work as well with urinals, but is possible). I then wipe myself all over with the baby wipes I bring with me, which are not only incredibly hygienic but also produce a baby-like soft skin that I and my missus appreciate. I replace my clothes with the new ones, the ones not stained by my bathroom activities. Then I am ready for the world.
Of course, if I have to go multiple times, I need to carry many sets of clothes. But at what price is freedom? If not you then who? If not now then when?
Knees. Nees. Bnees.
Not only will I admit it, but I will tell you that I feel guilty when that other guy walks out of the stall before I am "done washing." Then I have to continue the act but ease into the real thing...without being obvious...then I "finish washing." I hate it when he, makes me half-wash and feel guilty for it!
Post a Comment