Today, I almost died. Or at least I thought I was going to die. And I'll be honest, I was a bit disappointed...not with the fact that I survived but that I didn't have the experience of my life flashing before my eyes. I wanted to see the past 27 years in the hyperspeed of a split second. But no. Nothing. Not even an old memory. Actually, my mind just went blank. It froze. This means one of two things: 1) The whole life-flashing-before-your-eyes thing is a hoax or 2) My mind knew better - that I was not in fact about to die. And so the instinct to go into life-flashing didn't trigger.
What is that about the mind? It just decides - Hey, I'm going to stop working normally and now rewind the summation of your memories "before your eyes" in a split second. Why does it just decide to do that? And why can't I make my mind do that right now? I'd love to watch The Movie of My Entire Life in a split second. And you have to wonder - what does that do to one's self-esteem when they survive the near death experience and realize that their entire life - all their accomplishments and successes - can be boiled down to but a second of time. Sheesh.
Ok....so I almost died today. I was out walking our dog, Thena - taking an enjoyable saunter (and meander) when out of nowhere, an enormous, monster-of-a-dog began charging toward us. Let me explain - this was a thick, husky, meaty Rottweiler/bulldog/boxer looking thing. Probably 150 lbs. It looked like a boar mixed with bear. A boar-bear. It was snarling, barking, and charging toward us as fast as it could. It had no leash. No collar. Just a random, stray Terrordog Boarbear roaming the streets and approaching us rather quickly.
So I began to run away from it (after soiling myself, of course). By God's providence, this ferocious beast didn't feel up to following us after we moved out of its bull-like-charging path. It could have. It had nothing stopping it. As I rounded the corner to safety (knees wobbling and heart pounding) I began to think about what I would have had to do had it decided to continue its aggressive pursuit. I would have had to kick it in the face. As hard as I could. And pray that I didn't merely wound it and infuriate it anymore. I didn't want to have to kick it in the face. But I would have. It could have swallowed me and Thena whole, I believe.
So there. No death. No life-flashing. Not even any face-kicking.
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2 comments:
Face Kicking...I need a story that involves face kicking...I am not sure it would "work" on our blog.
I will keep trying to fit it in.
DK
I had this exact same experience (of thinking I was a goner) about 2 months ago while walking tillman. Until this day, I had never, never felt unsafe running in our neighborhood although I carried mace just in case- thinking I would use it on a person if needed (I'm sure that irony preaches somehow).
On the fateful day, a snarling, growling black and white pitbull mix came barrelling out at tman and I. In my head (which is nowhere near as creative as the matthryn brain) i thought, "This is it, Tillman is dead and I am going to lose a limb". (common denominator: no wonder-wheel of life memories flashing before my eyes).
Our defensive strategy was different though: we stopped running, looked at the ground, did not soil pants, and reached for mace. As soon as the dog got to us, she stopped growling, wagged her tail and proceeded with customary behind sniffing rituals.
Turns out the beast's has a name and it's "Maxine", sweet huh?
Maybe Tillman and Thena need some self defense classes?
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